You know you’re a mom if…
1. You’ve used the toilet with someone sitting on your lap.
2. You’ve had to explain to someone the importance of wearing pants when leaving the house.
3. You consider showering alone a borderline “spa day”
4. The amount of errands you run is based on how many times you feel like buckling and unbuckling mostly uncooperative people
5. Your purse has a nice layer of cracker and granola bar crumbs at the bottom.
6. Other people’s bodily fluids no longer scare or surprise you.
7. You have a really annoying voice for exciting moments like making a basket or going down a slide.
8. You never stop doing laundry, ever.
9. You’ve changed your vocabulary from stupid to silly and hate to dislike. You’ve even been known to use the word “icky” on occasion.
10. You’re really good at making up songs to get people on board with doing things.
11. Going to the grocery store by yourself excites you.
12. You find stickers on your clothes a few times a week.
13. You feel like daylight savings is out to get you.
14. Removing stains could be your next career.